I have written so many blog posts, but never feel like they are good enough to post. That's ridiculous though, isn't it? Because this is my blog. Not anyone else's. I started this blog as a place to document our lives. A place where friends and family can follow along on our weekly ventures and we can look back on posts and remember all the fun (and real) things that were happening. 

I look at our other blog all the time! It's a diary of another time! A record of life before. When Mike and I were dating, after we got engaged, and our first years of marriage. It's full of happy and sad, funny and boring. Some of the posts are very personal thoughts I put out there for anyone to read. Some posts are less intriguing and actually quite boring. But they are there, and I am so happy that they are.

Here on this blog I am going to post our real life. My thoughts (though semi filtered) still may seem less than perfect. Probably much like this post, very un-blogworthy. But if I stress about editing my thoughts, then it's not really real. It'll be filtered, after all, this is a public blog and I want to keep some things private from random followers and even family.

But if I worry too much about it, I hide it away and it never gets published. It never gets recorded to look back on, and what's the fun in that?

So with that said, here's to this new blog. This new part of our lives. This new story!

This little girl is one month old already. We love her cute face and pretty big eyes. And I can't get enough of those soft cheeks and find myself kissing them and taking in her sweet baby smell all day long. She is true perfection and we are so in love with her!! Mike told me the other day how much he loves waking up next to her. She's always looking at him with big eyes ready to talk to him and tell him all about everything.

I probably should have hired a photographer who knew what they were doing to come photograph my newborn... but where's the fun in that? I'm still learning how to use my camera, and am hoping with practice and time, I will get better and better. Some of the pictures in this post are actually from my really fancy camera. And by really fancy camera I mean my cell phone. I did it. I used my iPhone to take my newborns photos. But not all of them were taken with an IPhone! Sheesh!

My mom was in town and made Tennesy that beautiful blanket. I made the hat and TuTu, and a friend gave me the cute headband. I have a whole file full of pictures from this shoot, so don't you worry! You'll be getting many more over the next few weeks ;D

I'll also do a tutorial on the photography and the tutu soon. So keep your eyes peeled!

I don't know how I can be so happy and also more exhausted than I've ever been, at the same time. Like completely exhausted. I also didn't know I could be so in love with someone. I thought I knew love when I met Mike, but I think we both agree that this is a whole new love. And seeing Mike with our little girl just makes my heart melt. We are definitely smitten by this girl, and are so happy she is finally here. I'll post the birth story soon, but for now we are enjoying this moment. Taking ridiculous amounts of pictures, trying to stay awake, dozing for those five minutes when we can, and just watching her sleep when we can't! Oh how we love this little girl. Welcome to the family, Tennesy.

Nov. 5

My sweet mama came to town last week!  It's been so fun having her here, and she has been such a huge help. Thank heavens for mamas, am I right? We spent yesterday at the hospital and we are at a different one tonight! We all can't wait to hold this sweet girl we have been waiting so long to meet.

How did the TV control move? Oh just because baby girl kicked it so hard. Oh did I mention SHE'S STILL INSIDE ME? And yeah, I totally pulled out my phone and video taped it. I swear, this girl's doing karate in there these days! Or maybe she's practicing her kick boxing..

How many more days left?

I was sitting on the couch after a phone interview with a potential Doula, telling Mike all about it. He was looking at me, but typing at his computer, and I apologized and told him he could keep doing what he was doing. He told me I was fine, so I ignored his typing and continued talking. I was going on and on about this Doula and what roll she plays in our birth and what she said, and how many births she's attended, and blah blah blah, and then I stopped because I noticed he was still typing.

He then Said "Sorry. I'm presenting this right now" 

Right now?! He was on a group chat presenting something he built and he was letting me yammer on about a doula?! Man I'm annoying! I told him he needs to tell me to "stop talking and shut up!" How is it that I married the sweetest man? He was sitting there trying to listen to me talk about a Doula, all the while trying to present something to his team. And I thought he just wasn't interested in what I was saying :P This man, I tell you. He's the kindest man there is. He really is. And the poor guy married me. I don't know how he puts up with me, but I'm sure glad he does :)

And this may be a picture from the other night, when he was making peanut butter cookies. Yep, I got myself a keeper! 

                               

                                        Two more weeks until baby girls due date.

                             I wonder if she'll show up on time or if she'll surprise us...

So much to do, so little time

There's still so much to get done, and I'm running out of time.
When we moved in to this new house, we unpacked everything but didn't put stuff away. Like the computers got placed in the center of the living room  and have only moved once to be pushed against the wall to make walking space. When the couches were delivered they got set in the most inconvenient spots ever and can't be moved until the misplaced piano gets carried up a flight if stairs. Which Mike can't do alone, and I'm no help! So there they sit.

If you squeeze past them and go in to the kitchen, you will find the bookshelf that got placed in the corner, and all of the shelves and items that belong on the bookshelf sitting on the floor and half of the table. I can't put these items away, because they go on the bookshelf that does not belong in the kitchen. But again, I can't carry it up the stairs to the guest room. So there it sits too. 

Then there's the TV and the TV stand that is half painted. I'm waiting to paint the other side of it until I can pull it out and get to it. But I can't until the piano is moved and the TV/TV stand are in the living room. To do this the couches need to be moved and again, same problem as above. Are you beginning to see the issue? 

I cannot walk through my house without tripping over things, and I really want to have a table again. I can't decorate or hang anything on the walls, until things are put away and furniture is where it's supposed to be. So I don't feel like the house is a home yet. I really want things ready for the holidays! And I want everything done before the baby gets here, and preferably before my mom visits, so we can actually sit on the furniture and not trip over things walking from one room to the next.

 I put away the stuff I could, but the heavy things I can't do. And a lot of the heavy stuff needs to be moved before I can finish with the light stuff. Putting shelves back on the book case, putting the books on the shelves, getting picture frames off the floor and up on the walls, etc. My To Do list doesn't have nearly enough check marks. I think I'm going to need to pay someone to come do this heavy lifting for me. Mikes too busy with work and half of the stuff he can't do alone. This mama needs to nest, and this is making it very difficult, haha.

I have a week and a half until my mom gets here, and about two weeks until babies birth date. Something better happen soon because we're running out of time! Mike, being the sweetheart he is, took me shopping to get the items on our birth list over the weekend though. We gathered a lot of the supplies we will need which is a great feeling! but also a little scary.
This little girl will be here before we know it! But we're totally excited!!

Lately

Last week was General Conference and we stayed in bed all day. Mike did get up and make homemade horchata and blueberry pancakes and I got up to do the dishes (I hate dirty dishes) But other than that, we stayed in bed, snuggled up, watching conference, drinking delicious horchata, and enjoying this moment in our lives. It's a wonderful chapter right now, and we can't wait to start the next one with our little girl.

 I have been feeling like nothing is going how it should and everything is a jumbled mess, but I spent the day washing and sorting little baby clothes and it was perfect. It reminded me that no matter what is happening, where we are, if the house is unpacked or not, I need to relax. Because this sweet baby is perfect. She is my calm and my peace, and once she is in my arms, none of that other stuff is going to even matter.

We also started our birthing classes and they are going really well. I'm hoping they will help me feel more prepared for this birth. Do you ever feel prepared? Mike has been a saint, and I couldn't do any of this without him. He is incredible, and is going to be an amazing dad. And I'm so glad he is with me, because if he wasn't I would be the only one laughing in our birthing class.

I'm sorry but when she starts talking about massaging the perineum I can't help but think of this. And when the book is quoting a Dr. Dick-Read and you are standing in a circle growling, it's really hard not to start laughing.

week 36

Like every other expecting mama, I signed up for those weekly updates on those pregnancy websites. Each week they send you an email letting you know that your baby is the size of a radish, or a head of lettuce, and tell you that your back is probably hurting this week, or you will soon need to buy those maternity clothes you've been avoiding. They really aren't very helpful at all, but it's fun to get a little reminder of how many weeks along you are, and what your baby looks like each week. Fun until you are nearing the end, and you are already totally stressed out, and open up your inbox to find this weekly update waiting for you!

"Congratulations!" It says.

Thank you!! I'm totally excited to meet this sweet baby. Congratulations indeed :) I've grown a little human!

And then you continue reading..

"Your baby will be born any time now,  as most births take place between weeks 37–40. Although this is an exciting time, it can also be a time of anxiety.." 

YOU'RE TELLIN' ME! Like this is really happening? THANKS FOR THAT! Your letter started out so kind. What happened? As if my anxiety weren't bad enough, you had to send me this weekly update and remind me that I have to push this baby out of my vagina, and then go on to remind me that it could happen at any minute on any day anywhere "between weeks 37-40"? Great! 

"He or she is one week away from being considered full term, at 19 inches in length and weighing around six pounds."

Yeah so as you've made it very clear, I'm going to be birthing this baby SOON. Let's not talk about numbers, okay? Thanks.

And to make sure you are really stressed out they remind you that you are not prepared for this birth at all.

"If you haven’t done so yet, pack a hospital bag in preparation for labor."

Well I've got a killer hospital bag checklist made! Does that count??

"Talk with your healthcare provider about any concerns you may have as you continue to wait for your water to break."

Yeah, that's how they ended it. Those were their closing words everybody.

SERIOUSLY? I HAVE A GAZILLION CONCERNS! Take a seat. This could take a while. First concern... That you just said "continue to wait for your water to break" NO THANKS! 

Mama OUT.

Next time I quit reading after the "congratulations"

TMI does not stand for Too Much Ice Cream

You can never have too much ice cream...

So I have officially for reals this time had to listen to the doctor, the nurse, and the midwife. 

Sounds like the beginning to a bad joke, eh?

 Last week I spent a whole day with the midwife in labor and delivery. I had to call Mike from work and go to the hospital. I felt absolutely ridiculous and really badly making Mike leave work, but I followed orders and my midwife was glad I did. She needed to know what was going on, and apparently baby girl wants to come early.

As I sat in the cab on the way to the hospital taking "Labor Stop" every 15 minutes, it all became very real. At some point this baby will be coming out of me. I will be a mother. Passing the buildings and unfamiliar overpasses, I realized this is our home right now. This is where our little girl will be born. Mike and I will be parents, and it's up to us to look after this child.

I'm not saying it didn't become real months ago when I found out I was pregnant, or when my belly button popped, or when my legs were spread wide for the cervix check in the bedroom with the midwife. Yeah if things weren't real by then, they sure as heck got real there! But it all just hit me. It wasn't until I saw the baby's face on the monitor later at the hospital, that I really fell in love. This is my child and I must do everything I can to keep her safe. It made me so excited seeing her beautiful little face, I could hardly stand it!

I've surprised myself with how relaxed I've been through this pregnancy though. I think knowing that you can only do so much and also not really knowing anything at all kind of helps. I have been stressed with The move, interviewing midwives, transferring records, finding hospitals and trying to find a birthing class, but I think that has had me too busy to really take it all in.

As I laid at the hospital with straps across me monitoring my contractions and the babies heartbeat, It was really good to hear the nurse tell me that I am indeed having real labor contractions. It's good to be reassured that you aren't completely crazy sometimes. I was sent down to have an ultrasound to make sure I wasn't dilating, and while I wasn't glad to be there under such circumstances, it was so great to see our chubby cheeked baby girl up on the monitor! She was cracking us up with her big cheeks and puckered lips. And of course she had the hiccups, because she always has the hiccups. But she was blinking and looking around and absolutely beautiful. I still pictured her like the tiny little babe from our 20 week ultrasound. She looked so different now! I wasn't dilated, I got to see her cute face, and I was ready to go home.

When we got back up to the room and I told the doctor everything was good, she still wanted to check me one more time now that it had been a while. I didn't think I needed to, nor did I want to. But I pulled my skinny jeans down and spread those knees again. Who's idea was it to wear skinny jeans anyway? Worst idea ever!

She checked me, and my cervix had opened more, which is not so good. What this means is that my body is saying I'm ready to have my baby! But my body is a liar. It's not ready to have this baby. This mama ain't ready to have this baby! So the pain I'm feeling with my contractions is from my cervix opening up. From what I understand, When the cervix opens enough you lose that mucus plug that's somehow keeping that baby inside of you and you start dilating! Sooo absolutely gross but also exciting, when you aren't still six weeks away from your due date!

So bed rest. That's where I am now. And what do I do when put on bed rest? I don't see my bed. I decided before the pain got too painful to handle, I better try to finish up some things before I couldn't. Which I quickly realized was a very dumb thing to do as I sat in the shower, shaking from the lighting bolt pain shooting up between my legs. This post is just chuck full of TMI. Like I said, things are getting real over here.

So here is the dresser I've been turning TV Stand, and the ottoman I've been recovering. They both are still only half done, but half is better than not half! I worked on those as much as I could Sunday night, and Monday I totally learned why I shouldn't have been an idiot. And it wasn't just because I was trying to hurry and messed up my corners, lol.

Grocery shopping, working on projects, going for a walk... all bad ideas when you've been told by a doctor, a nurse, and a midwife (there's that bad joke again) to stay down. As I laid on the bed with my legs crossed ever so tightly because I was sure she was going to fall out at any given moment, I reconsidered my decisions, and have given in.

If you need me, I'll be the scary lady on the bed, wearing the sexy sweats. I mean my very expensive recreation clothes.

Our house

So I don't know if you know, but we really lucked out on the place we found here. I looked and looked and LOOKED for a reasonably priced apartment and couldn't find anything. I also don't know if you have searched for places to live in California for under $3,000, Yes you read that right, But it is practically impossible. I mean, you have to factor in a whole lot when searching for a place to live, and safety was top on my list, but so was rent. Safety is also not as easy as you might think. But for being the largest suburb in the metropolis, I'd say we got petty lucky as far as safety goes.

We had signed on an apartment, and not two minutes after we did, a friend found a listing for this place on craigslist. It was the SAME price as the dark apartment, with the tiny elevator and creepy murder movie hallway. I didn't believe that was really the price of rent. It was a steal! There was just no way!

We had spent the whole day hopping from one apartment to the next, and I was tired and done. But 

we went right over to look at it, and we were sold. I mean, anything was better than where we had just come from, haha. But I just knew this was as good as it was going to get here, and we needed to jump on it.

We had to make our decision right then, and we decided to go for it. We snatched it out from another couple with two kids, and felt badly about it, knowing that they would probably end up in the apartment with the murder movie hallway now. But we didn't feel badly enough to go somewhere else... I'm sure they found somewhere just fine. ...I hope...

The price of living here is outrageous! To score a place like this for the price that we did is amazing. I'm pretty sure the home had been vacant for quite some time, and wasn't well kept. It has old appliances and smells musty. But I like that musty smell... so I'm happy. It's very beautiful, and we are so thankful to God for leading us to such a nice home.

Now I've just been trying to make it a home. It's hard to make a home in a new place, but as we get more comfortable in the city and meet people, it's starting to get easier. My goal is to meet my neighbors. I think it's good to know your neighbors. And I think its especially good to know them when you share walls with them. Unless they are creepy. Then you should avoid eye contact and try not to do anything that would anger them.

So part of making this place home, is by decorating. Laying a rug, or two, or three, hanging pictures on the walls, clearing the boxes out of the house, and arranging the furniture. This is where I'm having some problems.

I have some projects I want to get done before baby comes. Like painting the TV stand, and setting up the computers somewhere that isn't in the middle of the living room. But the layout of this house is hard to work with. The living room is split. You walk in the front door, and you have 1/2 a room that I have made the more formal room, and then up some stairs is the other 1/2 of the room that I have turned in to the T.V. Room. One wall downstairs has a fire place, and one wall upstairs is one big mirror.

I'll post some pictures later. Here is a picture of the formal room for now.

I'm really not diggin' it. That couch? That piano? Where would you put everything?

I'm too excited to sleep

30 weeks already. I can't believe it.

I remember reading blogs or having friends announce their pregnancies and I felt like the nine months would fly by so quickly!! All of a sudden they would be announcing the birth and I would think, "are you sure? Has it really been nine months, already?"  That is how I feel with my own pregnancy! When I stop and think back six months ago to when I told Michael, it seems like it was so long ago. But when I think of how many weeks I have left, I can't believe I am here already! I am so excited to meet this sweet little baby, I can hardly stand it!

There have been weeks where I've felt like it's taking forever and I just want my little girl to hurry and get here. And then there are days where I think "I only have how many weeks left? But I am not ready!" and then I have a mild panic attack. 

I think the move was a good distraction from counting down the seconds. I've been so busy house hunting, packing, moving and then unpacking, that it's been too crazy to even think about how far along I am! But it's also brought a lot of anxiety and stress. You wouldn't believe the ridiculousness I've been through with doctors and midwives and birth centers and hospitals, oh my! If I sit on hold one more time, I might officially go mad! I never thought it would be so hard to schedule and appointment with an OB/GYN. Seriously California. Not cool.

But now that we are here and I've been trying to find someone to birth this baby, I feel like she will be here way too soon. I need more time! But at the same time I am so ready to have her here, it's like waiting for Christmas! I think I'll be more ready when I know where I'll be birthing and who will be helping me deliver. -Oh the delivery. Oh the pain. Oh my gosh.
Yeah on second thought,  let's keep this baby INside as long as possible.
 Please & thank you.

a little update

It was Mike's birthday this last Friday so  we decided to go out for BBQ. We have both been wanting some good BBQ and were really excited when we saw a joint right up the road from us! It was terrible! Haha! We will never eat there again!

Apparently there aren't any good BBQ places here. We have searched the internet and asked people. Unless you want Chinese BBQ... There is a lot of that! Good thing we got Mike a new Grill for his birthday :) I can't wait to try it out!

^^New Ping Pong paddle = one happy birthday boy^^

We found a grocery store up the road from us that sells really good brownies in their bakery. So after our bad dinner, we went over there and rented an equally bad redbox movie, and then picked up a package of chocolatey good-ness. I'm just glad we got those brownies. After the bad dinner and terrible movie, they saved the night. haha.

We went to Downtown Niles on Saturday and went to all the little antique shops. It was so fun, and to top it off, we shared a delicious banana split to continue the birthday celebrating.

We also picked up these fun buttons. Have you taken a steak break today?

We are slowly figuring out this new city, and trying to make it feel more like home. It's been a hard couple of weeks, but each day gets better and better.

We went in to San Francisco the Saturday before last and froze our tails off! We had so much fun and made our way to Ghirardelli  square for some hot cocoa and a hot fudge brownie. We were so cold, and I kept stopping to rest because of my contractions, and Mike kept telling me "we can just come back later" but NOTHING gets in the way of this mamma and her Ghirardelli! I had my eye on the prize. That Hot Fudge brownie was calling to me and it was totally worth it!

The community here is very different, and the city itself is so different from home, but we are warming up to it. It's going to take some time, and it's hard, but it'll happen. Mike LOVES his job. He's doing really well, and I'm so proud of him!

So there's your update. Sorry it's not more exciting!

baby bump

My sweet husband puts up with me and my crazy ideas. 

I have tried to take pictures of my growing belly every couple of weeks, but they never really turn out. You know, never Pinterest worthy. I always end up looking like a dork. And then crying or getting grumpy. I'm pregnant, okay?! 

I would love to have a professional photographer taking my pictures every week for me, but you know, that's not going to happen. So I have my professional photographer husband doing them for me.   

With my iPhone. 

Oh I love that man. 

I may look like a dork and be in funny poses 99% of the time, but at least I'm getting some pictures. In this particular bunch my hands looked funny and I had a goof face.. this is where a professional would be nice. But I kept the photos anyway, because posed or not, it's fun to see my belly growing with baby girl inside. 

25 weeks

An update and the beginning of blogging.. Again!

I haven't sat down and written an actual blog post in over a year! My goal is to start it up again and stick to it. (I will be posting over here on the new blog, and working on making it look better) I have recently decided this would be a good idea, because there are so many scary and exciting changes happening over here in Kramerville, so I am going to quickly fill ya'll in. 
Mike had a series of difficult interviews and at the end of them all, he landed the job! I am so very proud of him and am amazed by him every single day. He is so incredible, and brave. 

So while we are all very excited for this new job opportunity, we are also a little sad, because we will be moving all the way to California! We are excited, but it's a little hard to pick up and move. They want him to start very soon, on July 21st! So we have a lot to get done in only a few weeks. This includes finding somewhere to live! I am packing and sorting while Mike finishes his weeks at his current job, and then we are out of here! It's all happening so fast!! 

On top of the move, I am trying to find new doctors, and plan my birth and the arrival of our sweet baby, GIRL! It's true, I'M PREGNANT!
We are over the moon excited over here. She is very healthy and apparently she is very squished. I'm not sure if that means she is going to be tall like her daddy, or if I'm just too small for her to be comfortable, lol! But I can't stop looking at her sweet ultrasound picture. She is perfect and we love her already. 

We have been enjoying the summer as we do best, by camping and spending time together and with friends. We will miss going up the Canyon on the weekends, but I'm sure we'll find a new spot to explore near our new home in California.

We went to Moon Lake this last weekend and it was beautiful! This weekend we will be at a family reunion, and then two weeks after that, we will be in California, ready or not!
 

I had a fun birthday weekend, and got a new birthday present from Kramer, that is going to be even better in California! He didn't know we would be moving there when he bought it for me, and it made us laugh. He got really sick the day before my birthday though, bummer! We were going to go up to Idaho that day because it was also Father's Day! We didn't make it up there, but we still had a lot of fun here!

Anyway, there is the update! All the important things at least. I may not blog a lot in the next few weeks, as I am going to be very busy apartment hunting and packing. But as soon as I can, I will sit down and update everyone on what is happening. And maybe it'll be from a real computer and not my phone!  Hopefully this will be a good way to keep family up to date on our lives in California and a way for me to document the things that are happening in our little family.  We are going to miss everyone so much! So you all better come visit us!!!

DIY Anywhere Chair

Hello! It's been a long time since last I posted.. but here I am, hoping to start this blog up for reals this time guys. Seriously.
So I truely stink at tutorials. Infact, I'm really not the best at sewing either, but that doesnt stop me from pretending I can! Haha
So over memorial Day weekend, I decided to try making a new little find. I was with my cute mom, so obviouslywe ended up at the craft store! And I found this fabric and had to get it for this project! 

So today I bring you the "Anywhere Chair"
One hour- One chair- Two different ways to sit!

SUPPLIES:1/2 yrd fabric

1/2 yrd. contrasting fabric

1/2 yrd. batting

Velcro
Scissors

Pins
Machine

 ASSEMBLY

The seat
Lay right sides facing each other and cut 18 3/4 long x 11 1/4 wide
The waist strap
Fabric still facing right sides together, cut 36 3/4 long x 6 1/2 wide
The connecting piece
With the extra piece, cut 4 1/2 long x 3 wide

Now pin the batting to your pieces, and trim to shape
Sew pieces up, leaving an openeing at the bottom of your seat to pull rightside out. This will be the opening where you will sew in your connecting piece
Next do the same to the waist strap, leaving that opening to attatch the connecting piece

Sew the sides of the connecting piece, flip rightside out, and attatch everything together!

Voila! Easy peasy rice and cheesy!

A yard of fabric can actually make two seats, and two connector pieces, but not two waist straps. 

It's really a simple sewing project if your sewing machine doesn't jam, and the lady at the fabric store can cut straight! We had a good laugh making these. We made about six over the weekend, and maybe should have stopped after the first... but we kept going, because thery really are just so fun to whip up! And now I'm here trying to post a tutorial, like I know how to do these things! I know you love me! I also made these, so they are reversable. All you do for this, is make the fabric on the back, look cute with the fabric on the front, and sew velcro on BOTH sides. Also, making the seat a little longer, would allow a padded head rest, and a covering over a shopping cart handle, were one to use it whilst shopping. Yes I brought it to the store to try it out. Don't judge!